Jokes

this is how indian man do business :b
no offend to indian friends pls!!!!

Rajpat (father): "I want you to marry a girl of my choice."

Son: "I will choose my own bride!!!"

Rajpat: "But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter.."

Son: "Well, in that case...ok"

Next Rajpat approaches Bill Gates.

Rajpat: "I have a husband for your daughter...."

Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!!!!!"

Rajpat: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."

Bill Gates: "Ah, in that case...ok"

Finally Rajpat goes to see the president of the World Bank.

Rajpat: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president."

President: "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"

Rajpat: "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law."

President: "Ah, in that case...ok"

That is how Indians do business...

lols~
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Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman'speriod?
A: Your salary, it comes once a month lasts about 5days and if it doesn't come, it means you are in big trouble.

Q: What's the difference between biology and sociology?
A: When the baby looks like his dad or mom, then it is biology.When the baby looks like the neighbor, then it is sociology.

Q: What's the height of recycling?
A: Sending a sanitary napkin for dry cleaning.

Q: Doctor: You look so weak & exhausted. Are you having3 meals a day as I have advised?
A: Lady: Doctor, I thought you said 3 males a day.

Q: Girl friend & boy friend go for a movie. In the dark, mosquito enters the girl's skirt, Guess where it would have bitten????!?!?!?!
A: The boy friend's hand.

Q: Tarzan and the animals went to the river to take abath.Tarzan removed his clothes. All the animals laughed.Tarzan asked "Why"?
A: The animals told him. Your tail is in front".
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Q: In Europe, what do you call a female wearing sunglasses & a big hat?
A: A rich lady

Q: In China, what do you call a female wearing sunglasses & a big hat?
A: Tai-tai

Q: In Singapore,what do you call a female wearing sunglasses and a big hat?
A: Carpark Attendant
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Dear Hokkien speaking friends,
Laugh until you kee siao! (CRAZY)

Here we go....

Ah Lian called big brother Ah Beng over the telephone.

Lian: "Ah Beng kor, I can't get my new jig saw puzzle fixed, mah-chiam all the edges cannot fix together, lah."

Beng: "Jig saw puzzle si mi picture, ha?"

Lian: "The box show a big rooster, kanna like the one in talkingcock.com ."

Beng: "Okay, lah, okay, lah. I come over to tor-long lu, lah."

Ah Beng arrives at Ah Lian's place, where she happily leads him to the kitchen table where the jigsaw puzzle is.

Ah Beng examines the puzzle and says, "Si ghee na, si bay gong, put back the corn flakes into the box, lah."

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Dr. Quek made a routine house call to Mr. Lim, one of his elderly patients.

He asks, "And how are you doing today, Mr. Lim?"

Mr. Lim replies, "I feel just fine, doc. But you know,it's the strangest thing. Every night when I get up to pang jio, the bathroom light goes on for me automatically when I open the door!"

The doctor is worried that the old man is getting senile, so he phones the man's son, and the son's wife answers.

The doctor tells her, "Mrs. Lim, I'm a little concerned about your father-in-law.It seemsthat when he gets up to urinate at night and opens the bathroom door, the light somehow goes on..."

At which point, Mrs. Lim yells, "Aiyoh, Ah Seng! Ah Pa pang jio in the fridge again!"

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QUESTION: How do you know frogs are Hokkien?
ANSWER : Because when it's cold, they go "kwah, kwah, kwah".

QUESTION : How do Hokkien prawns laugh?
ANSWER: Hae hae hae (hokkien for prawns)

QUESTION: How do Hokkien fish laugh?
ANSWER : Hee hee hee (hokkien for fish)

And here is a classic..............

QUESTION : What's the difference between Ang-mor and Hokkien fairy Tales?
ANSWER: Ang-mor fairy tales begin with "Once upon a time..." and Hokkien fairy tales begin with "Lim Peh ka li kong..."
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haha...hv fun reading :b